A friend means well even when he hurts you. Proverbs 27:6 (Good News)

Jesus shows us that real friends care enough to confront. Even when it's painful, they'll tell you the truth. They won't let you waste your life in silence: "A friend means well even when he hurts you." Proverbs 27:6 (Good News)

I've found that correcting another person in a loving way is powerful. Done the right way, it builds people up. The difference between the right and the wrong way is your attitude. If all you're doing is pointing out faults, then stop. The purpose has to be to correct, not to condemn.

You need to ask, "What's my motive in this? Am I correcting him for my benefit or for his benefit?"

A lot of times we want to correct people just because they're being jerks and they're hassling us. We think, "If they would stop being such a jerk, my life would be easier."

That's the wrong motive.

Instead, follow Ephesians 4:15, which says, "Speak the truth in love." So the key to proper correction: Affirm the person; then correct the behavior.

We who are strong in the faith ought to help the weak in order to build them up in the faith. Romans 15:1

Jesus encouraged people, and he told those who are strong in faith to make a point of encouraging others in their faith: "We who are strong in the faith ought to help the weak in order to build them up in the faith." (Romans 15:1)

This Christmas season encourage the people around you.

For one thing, we all need confidence. When you know that someone believes in you, it brings out your best. Jesus did this with the Apostle Peter. "Petros," Peter's name, meant pebble. But Jesus said, "Pebble, you're going to be a rock. I'm giving you a new name."

When Jesus said that to Peter, the apostle was anything but a rock. He was Mr. Impulsive, Mr. Foot-in-Mouth. But Jesus didn't tell him what he was - He told him what he could be. He gave him confidence to live up to his potential.

We all need encouragement. Over the years, I've kept an Encouragement File. Every time anybody writes me a note, a card, or a letter, I file it. Even if it's mildly encouraging- like "Better luck next time!" - or- "You tried on that sermon, but good try!" - it still gets filed.

Then, on days when I'm discouraged and down and tired, I get out the Encouragement File, and I read through all the letters and cards that I've collected.

When you give encouragement, it needs to be genuine. So, give from the heart and with sincerity. Encouragement also needs to be regular- don't be stingy with your encouragement.

And encouragement needs to be specific. Instead of saying, "I enjoyed the meal," say, "I can tell you put a lot of effort into this meal and the seasoning you chose was perfect."

Instead of saying, "You did a good job," say, "I noticed you handled that angry customer with tact and you maintained your cool under pressure."